It’s Thursday, so I’m Crafting my Life! This year, I’m just writing about whatever is currently on my mind. I invite you to do the same. If you would like to chime in and contribute a guest post about your own journey, please drop me a line.
I decided this post needed a sound track. If you agree, check out this video of the legendary Mary Travers singing Leaving on a Jet Plane. If you don’t, then don’t. I won’t force any music on you, because I am considerate like that.
Anyways, back to the topic at hand. A couple of hours after this post goes live, I’ll be leaving on a jet plane of my own. This probably isn’t news to you, since I can’t stop talking about my trip to BlogHer this week. You’d think I was the first person to ever attend a conference or something. But then, if you read my blog you might think I believe I’m the first person to ever have children, so perhaps this behaviour isn’t exactly unusual for me. Plus, the honest truth is that this trip is kind of a big deal for me, and I have been planning it for the last couple of years.
Now that it’s here – or about to be here – I feel as if I am about to look behind some kind of curtain to find out just what my prize will be. Will it be a goat, or a cow, or a brand new car? Will I be glad that I spent the last two years planning and worrying about this day? Will all of the effort and expense and time away from my kids be worth it, or not? I am about to find out.
When I was 14 years old my mother took my sister and me to Disney World in Florida. It was our first trip on and airplane, and our first visit to a Disney theme park. And I remember feeling sort of let down. I mean, sure, the place was impressive, but the rides were kind of slow and because we went in the off season several of the best ones were closed for maintenance. Looking back, though, I see that the problem wasn’t with Disney World. It was with the way that I had built the whole thing up in my head, all of the expectations that I had created for it, and the reality that no actual real-life place could ever live up to them.
I am … well … let’s just say I’m several years older, now, and I would like to think I’m a little bit wiser. I understand that no single event or experience is going to change my life forever, or be the missing puzzle piece of joy I’ve always been looking for. I understand that time is limited and obligations are pressing and I may not get to actually sit down and have a heart-to-heart with the dozens and dozens of friends I hope to touch base with in San Diego. I am solidly more practical.
All the same, I don’t want to live a life without expectations and hopes. There’s something to be said for hoping for the best and being open to great possibilities, and so I don’t think that giving up on our youthful exuberance is the answer. I suspect the answer lies somewhere in the gray area in the middle, where we have a mature understanding of life’s realities while believing that good things can happen, and trusting in ourselves to make them happen.
And so I am heading off to BlogHer with an open mind, ready to embrace the experience for what it is. I hope that I get the chance to meet some new and interesting people, and share ideas and grow as a writer. I also hope that I have a chance to let loose a little bit without my kids in tow. But mostly, I hope that I’m able to dwell in that space where I can see the possibility, without letting it consume me and disappoint me. Hopefully, I’ve grown up enough for that.
Have you ever really looked forward to something that ended up being totally disappointing? How do you balance optimistic expectations against practical realities? And do you happen to know of any good Mexican restaurants near the San Diego Convention Centre? Any and all input would be appreciated!
I’m with you. I often try to keep my expectations low so I’m not disappointed, which by and large I find is a good policy. A couple years after we were married my husband and I took a trip with another couple to South Carolina. Then we talked about how when you were always getting dragged on your parents’ vacations you would think about how great it would be when you got to pick your own – and we agreed it totally lived up to the fantasy. I’m sure BlogHer will for you too.
allison’s last post … Dinner Party of Awesome
I have high positive anticipation for a lot of things in my life, unless I know from experience that it might be difficult.Then I might adjust my dial …a bit. But I usually don’t feel let down. There’s always something to be interested in, even if it’s a personal learning. I think I get as much fun in planning a trip as the actual reality of it, but I enjoy that.There’s always something unexpected and I kind of get off on that.
Now if what I’m planning is a disaster, and, yes, that has happened, I console myself with the stories I’ll have to tell my friends and family, starting with, “You’re not going to BELIEVE what happened!” Drama, after all, has it’s place!
If I were to pitch my anticipation enthusiasm lower I would be miserable. A negative result is just that. It’s an “Oh, well.The next one will be better.” I would rather go through life excited and brush off the few disappointments than not.
Isn’t it interesting how different we all are? I realize my approach isn’t for everyone but it sure works for me. And I wonder just how much of this is how we are wired rather than how we’re reacting to past experiences. It’s still the nature-nurture debate, isn’t it?And I’m so glad we’re all different in our responses to life because it’s just so fascinating to meet and try to understand someone who is so different.(Well, you know, unless you have to live with them day in and day out.)
And here’s the other thing: we tend to collect information to prove we’re right in regards to our World View. I know I probably disregard all kinds of negatives when maybe I could be focusing more on them. Perhaps my learning curve would have been faster had I done that. But life has a way of teaching us what we need to know over time so it balances out eventually.
Have a fabulous time in San Diego, Amber. I’ll bet you have some wonderful adventures to tell us and maybe a few eye -wideners, as well. Just remember to tell all! xo