I Chose This

It’s Thursday, so I’m Crafting my Life! I invite you to join in the fun. If you would like to share a story from your own journey, please drop me a line. If you’d like to find out more about my online class on living with intention and my upcoming e-book, visit craftingmylife.com.

Relationships go through ups and downs. We all know this. The relationships we have with our children are no different. Sometimes it’s smooth sailing, sometimes you can’t even see the road anymore for all the bumps in it. To be fair to parents, kids really know how to make things harder, what with all the growing and changing they do. As soon as you have a system that works, they change the game and you’re left grasping at straws.

In spite of the constantly changing nature of parenting, I am currently in a place where I’m feeling very warm-and-fuzzy when it comes to my kids. I don’t expect it to last. On the contrary, I know it won’t last. But for right now, the waters are reasonably calm and I’m able to look at them and see how very awesome they are. They’re two amazing little people, and they’re my children. They’re kind of like me, only smaller and just all-around better. I can’t always see that so clearly, but for whatever reason, right now I can.

From my current position, where I’m in a good place with my parenting, I’m able to see one truth very clearly: I chose this life. I chose to have children, I chose to raise those children, I chose to do the kind of work I do, and live in the kind of house I live in. I chose the community I call home. Each of those choices brings upsides and downsides, but they’re all mine. And that’s really an amazing thing, when I think about it.

In the rush-rush-rush of the morning, when I can’t find the permission slip for the field trip and I’m trying to pack two school lunches, and I can’t convince my daughter that it’s too cold to wear shorts, it’s not always easy to remember that I am at the helm. At that moment, it certainly doesn’t feel like I’m at the helm. It feels like I’m stuck on a boat that’s about to crash into some rocks and I’m not sure how I got here. But when I can remember that, in fact, I deliberately chose to become a mother and raise two kids … well, somehow that changes my perspective.

Parenting really isn’t any different than anything else we do in life. Sometimes it’s easy to feel like other people are making choices for us, and we’re left holding the bag. We certainly don’t have control over the situation, and we’re not always able to achieve the specific outcome we desire at any given moment. But the more that we’re able to own our choices, and see what we can change, the better off we are. Even in our hardest moments, there’s almost always something we can do to improve our situation. By owning our choices, we put ourselves in the best possible position to see how we can affect our own lives.

My life isn’t particularly remarkable, in most ways. But it’s mine, and I chose it. In my own way, I’m living my dream. I certainly dreamed of one day spending my time writing and caring for my children, and now I do. It might not always be sunshine and rainbows, but it’s mine. If it isn’t working for me, I hold the power to make it better. I brought myself to this point, and I can bring myself to the next one. And you know what? I bet you can bring yourself to the next one, too.

How do you keep your perspective in the chaos of daily life with children? I’d love to hear!

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