It’s Thursday, so I’m Crafting my Life! This year, I’m just writing about whatever is currently on my mind. And if you would like to chime in and contribute a guest post about your own journey, please drop me a line and we’ll chat.
As I write this post, it is Wednesday afternoon at about 4:00pm. In an hour or so, the Vancouver Canucks will be taking to the ice downtown, battling the Boston Bruins for the Stanley Cup. For those of us who live in Vancouver, it is the stuff of legend. My husband Jon has had his own Stanley Cup dreams since he was knee-high to a grasshopper, and he’s been a Canucks fan for just as long. This evening could be the best or worst evening of his life. And there’s not a thing he can do to affect the outcome.
By the time you’re reading this post, it will all be over. You know how it played out. But from my vantage point in this chair, I have no idea. I cannot predict the future, so all I can do is hope for the best. I was thinking that I could come back and edit this post once the game’s over, but I’ve decided not to. Because leaving it as-is makes for an excellent object lesson in living with intention.
You see, there are many things in our life that are left to chance. You never know, for instance, when a tragedy or a miracle is going to strike from out of the blue. You don’t know for sure how the projects you undertake are going to turn out, and you can’t control all of the variables that impact the outcome. And this can be terrifying and frustrating. It can also make us feel as if there’s no point in acting, because so much is outside of our realm of influence. If everything’s left to fate, you might as well just sit back and enjoy the ride.
I imagine that as I read through this post tomorrow, reflecting on events that have already transpired, I will feel one of two ways. If the Canucks emerge victorious, I will feel as if the whole city has been vindicated. Four decades of rooting for the team through thick and thin (and mostly thin) will come down to a shining moment of triumph. It will seem almost fore-ordained, and as if the gods of hockey are smiling on us.
Or else, the Canucks could lose. If that happens, I will read this post and think that it was a whole lot of effort for nothing. All of the car flags, all of the kids wearing jerseys and on the street and holding signs asking people to honk, all of the crowds packed into downtown, all for naught. We pulled out all the stops, and came up short, and the whole enterprise may seem doomed from the outset.
But here’s the thing. That meaning that I ascribe to the events is arbitrary, and it doesn’t change the reality of the moment I’m presently in, just waiting for the party to start. The Canucks are neither foreordained nor doomed. No effort is wasted, and no outcome is a given. So we show up, because if we don’t risk losing, we can’t win. And if we don’t invest our emotional energy in outcomes beyond our control, we miss out on chances to learn and grow and experience. We have to put ourselves out there, even as we know that it may not work out for us, and the outcome is not entirely in our hands.
Whether you’re rooting for a team, starting a business, applying for a job, welcoming a new baby or praying that your kids make it home safe tonight, sometimes all you can do is hope for the best. And so that is what I will continue to do. I will continue to show up, hope for the best, and risk defeat. Because a life of intention is about actually living, come what may.
So true. This emphasis on all or nothing thinking is precisely the thing that leads to riots! (OK that might be a stretch). We all know that we learn more from crushing defeat than from stunning victories. Interestingly, I think Vancouver may have learned some painful lessons from the aftermath of the loss: that mobs fueled by booze are part of society and we need a concrete strategy to deal with these horrifying situations, and that despite this the vast majority of people are good-willed, spirited, kind-hearted people who will drive downtown with a broom to cleanup and show the world that Vancouver cares.
Its interesting how quickly the entire playoffs got shadowed by the rioting afterwards: its weird to read your comments knowing what happened. Like reading about planning for a birthday party that got usurped by an earthquake.
We HAVE a concrete strategy to deal with situations like last night. Depending upon your perspective, the strategy worked or didn’t, but it exists in black and white.
And some things were learned in ’94 that helped: ambulances lined up at St Paul’s instead of responding to individual calls, making it safer for paramedics and streamlining injured people into an automatic triage. I spoke to a paramedic once who described the ’94 riots and how their ambulance got stuck in a mob and flipped over WITH HER AND HER PARTNER IN IT!
Anyways, it was a bit surreal to read your post now.
I called it, though: I knew there would be riots if we lost. It seems insignificant now, that I felt it would happen. It IS too bad after such peaceful Olympics just last year.
The Canucks can have another run, but the riots won’t be erased by any means.
It’s a bit surreal for me, too. I decided to let it stand, though, because it further illustrates my point that you don’t know what’s going to happen. It could be fabulous, or it could be awful.
As an aside, I think many of us feared riots. I wonder if, on some level, all of the riot expectations were somewhat self-fulfilling. Although I’m not sure it makes a difference even if they are, since preparing for the worst is part of responsible emergency response.
I firmly believe that win or lose there would have been a riot. People came downtown prepared to cause an incident. It is a shame that most of the people of Vancouver have to be painted by this brush of violence.
I am sad to say it but I hope Vancouver never makes it this far again. The morons cannot be trusted and will spoil it all again.
Back to No-fun-couver
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It seems stupid to me how the Stanley Cup final is presented as a complete win-or-lose situation. I mean, they came second in the league after all! It’s like throwing a tantrum because you ONLY won the silver medal instead of appreciating what you have.
What a thought-provoking way to post about this. It’s so true – not everybody can win, so if you convince yourself that coming first is all that matters, a lot of people are going to feel pretty worthless a lot of the time.
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What a great lesson in why we should be brave. Sports are none of my business, so I kind of skipped over the hockey-related comments (although as an English teacher, I can’t see the word “riots” in print without thinking about “Lord of the Flies”). I know that the hockey game was the impetus for your post, Amber, but obviously the message applies to so much more.
Your children are so lucky to have you. What a great message to share with them as they take risks to pursue their dreams.
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I’ll admit I’m not much of a crazy cheering sports fan, but I do love hearing athlete stories. Sorry about the Canucks.
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