17-month-old Jacob is a runner. In venues from the library to the grocery store to the playground he takes off and never looks back. If I watch to see how far he’ll go he disappears around corners and behind shelves until I’m terrified and I run after him. In the game of toddler chicken I always lose. I tell myself that he runs because he knows I will follow. I’m not completely certain this is true, but it makes me feel better to believe it, because it means that he doesn’t really want to escape me so much as play a fun game of chase. Or, at least, fun for him.

My daughter Hannah didn’t run as far or as fast as Jacob does. She also wasn’t as quiet, and there was only one of her. Now I have two small people and, invariably, they head in opposite directions. And Jacob does his heading silently, without giving me audio clues as to his whereabouts. The result is that I am finding it much harder to keep tabs on him, and there is a lot of upset when I’m running away from Hannah to catch her brother.

I could confine Jacob to a baby carrier, stroller or shopping cart in public places. Sometimes I do, and sometimes it works. But sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes Jacob cries and fights against the confinement. It raises a dilemma, because of course he doesn’t want to hold my hand and he’s far too young to be reasoned with. And as much as I would generally love to avoid taking my toddler in public it’s just not practical. So I have decided to try leashing the baby using my trusty Maya Wrap.

I have extremely mixed feelings about the baby leash. On the one hand, you’re leashing a baby. I would find being on a leash to be humiliating and disrespectful. I have seen leashes used in ways that cause me to cringe, like the mother who kept her child on a kid leash on the otherwise empty playground. The whole idea just smacks of treating your child like a pet more than a person.

On the other hand, I have to keep my kid safe. My distraction techniques for outings only take me so far, and Jacob clearly wants to walk under his own steam. Pushing a screaming kid through the store isn’t terribly respectful, either. In fact, it’s possibly worse, because in that situation I am subjecting a whole store to my kid’s cries. Since I can’t reason with a 17-month-old, I’m left with few good options.

In the end I decided to give the leash a go, and see how it worked. My anti-leash sentiments are projections of my own feelings, which Jacob may not share. If he hates the leash I’ll know it. If he doesn’t mind it, I’ll know it, too. Either way, I am following his cues. So I gave the leash a go, and he seemed to sort of like it. At first he was confused and tried to shimmy out of it. Once I managed to get him moving, though, he was off and not in the least bothered. Never once did he cry or strain against it.

I think I have my answer. In situations where I feel it’s called for, I will use a baby leash. I will probably feel self-conscious about it, but this isn’t really about me. It’s about allowing my toddler reasonable freedom to explore while keeping him safe. If he likes it, that’s all that matters.

What about you? Have you ever used a kid leash? And under what circumstances?

My 15-month-old Jacob is a climber. There is ample photographic evidence of that truth right here on this blog, in fact. You can see him scale the piano shelf, or master the playground unassisted. Or there was that time he made it to the top of our patio table. He just likes to ascend stuff.

When Jacob was 11 months old he figured out how to climb 4-year-old Hannah’s step stool. We keep the stool in the kitchen so that our preschooler can stand at the counter and cook or eat or just be part of whatever’s going on. At first, we tried to discourage Jacob’s step stool use. After all, he couldn’t even walk at the time, so climbing up to the kitchen counter seemed a touch ill-advised. When Hannah wasn’t using her stool, we left it lying on its side. But as soon as Hannah needed it, Jacob would hear us and try to push his big sister out of the way.

The kids sharing Hannah’s step stool

It soon became clear that if an 11-month-old on a step stool was sort of unsafe, an 11-month-old and a 4-year-old on a step stool was a recipe for disaster. So I headed to this super-exclusive furniture boutique I know, and bought a second stool. And that mostly worked. The kids each had their space at the counter, and there were really very few bruises to show for it.

Kids on stools at the counter, carving pumpkins

Life was pretty good for a few months, there. I served the kids breakfast at the counter, or gave them utensils to play with while I cooked. Sometimes they would stand up on their stools and help me wash the dishes, separately or together. It was a happy time, and I was a happy mother.

Jacob helps me do the dishes

But, as they say, all good things must come to an end. In the case of the stools, Jacob got too smart. He realized that if something was out of his reach, he could push his stool around to get it. This is how I found him standing at the stove one day playing with the burner. Thankfully, it was off at the time and no damage was done, but the message was clear. My toddler and his stool were not staying put.

I didn’t see what the solution was, though. Ditching the step stools at that point seemed impossible. The kids and I enjoy them, when used properly. But I clearly couldn’t count on their proper use. And then my husband came up with an answer – the stools needed leashes, so that they couldn’t stray.

The ‘leash’ on Jacob’s stool

The ‘leash’ on Hannah’s stool

We bought some rope and tied the stools to our kitchen island. There is some slack, but not enough to reach the knives or the stove or the kitchen sink. Happiness reigns once more. Unless, of course, you’re a toddler who really wants that knife, and then you might be briefly screamy. But that? Is a small price to pay for my relative peace of mind.

Have you had any near-misses that caused you to do some creative baby-proofing? Any experiences that made you want to lock your toddler in a secure cell for a year or two? Please share!

I am also participating in the Green Moms Carnival today! You can read my post, My Kids, The Planet and My Wallet, or you can check out lots of other great posts about saving money through green means over at Condo Blues.

Almost exactly 4 years ago my mother and I went to Sears and purchased a travel system. For the uninitiated, this is a stroller, infant seat, and car seat base all sold as a package. The infant seat can snap into the base for car trips, and then be transferred easily to a stroller and back again. I know some moms deride the ‘baby bucket’ on the basis that little ones need human contact, and shouldn’t spend all their time buckled into a plastic shell, and I see their point. But all the same I loved my infant seat.

Maybe not so much at first. When Hannah was born 6 weeks early the car seat was an obstacle. Before they would release her from the hospital she had to pass the ‘car seat test’. It involved strapping her into the car seat and monitoring her condition for 45 minutes or more. Really, they just want to be sure your little preemie is strong enough to survive that car ride home. It took days before they would let us do it, and became something of a sticking point for me. Luckily Hannah passed with flying colours.

Eventually we got our baby home, though, and I came to love the ease of the infant seat. When Hannah fell asleep we could take her out of the car without disturbing her. At home, on a walk in the stroller, or and running errands she would blissfully nap. The best naps were always in the car seat. My baby was not the kind of baby who would sleep through being removed from the seat and secured in a sling, no way Jose.

3-week-old Hannah at Rocky Point Park

Sadly, Hannah outgrew the infant seat before she was 6 months old. Although it’s rated to 30lbs (which is about what she weighed at 3 years old), for height it was only good until 26 inches. And so her little feet were poking out the end well before I expected them to, and we had to put her in a convertible seat. As expected, she woke up every time we took her out. It became a big challenge to juggle the baby and the diaper bag and get myself ready to go without the infant seat to lay her in. I missed it immediately.

3-month-old Hannah asleep outside Lonsdale Quay

When Jacob was born, I again relished the occasional car seat nap, as he happily slept in the entryway. To give you a sense of perspective the little man spends most of his day being carried or held. He generally naps either on my shoulder, or in the mei tai on my back. It’s only a few times a month that I get an hour or two of sweet bliss as he naps on his own in the car seat. And this time around I knew it would come to an end all too soon, so I took advantage of every chance to enjoy free hands.

3-month-old Jacob buckled in for a trip

Sadly, Jacob’s feet have been poking out the end of his infant seat for a couple of weeks. Finally I could ignore it no longer, and bought two brand spanking new Britax Marathons. They’ve been installed, and the infant seat is packed away, ready to go into storage. And I am back to waking the baby every time we exit the car. To loading him in and out of the car seat with each and every 3-minute stop at a convenience store. I want him to be safe, but I am still disappointed.

Jacob zonked out at 4 1/2 months

Oh infant seat, I will miss you.